1 00:00:01,020 --> 00:00:04,400 What do I do now that my book has failed? 2 00:00:04,880 --> 00:00:08,240 Who am I if not a literary genius? 3 00:00:08,510 --> 00:00:10,150 Louis has his restaurant. 4 00:00:10,250 --> 00:00:12,110 Evan and Emery are model students. 5 00:00:12,150 --> 00:00:15,580 Oh, even Eddie is on track to go to college. 6 00:00:15,750 --> 00:00:19,090 But here I am... rudderless. 7 00:00:19,260 --> 00:00:21,390 Mm-hmm. Uh, Mrs. Huang, again, 8 00:00:21,430 --> 00:00:23,890 I am a school counselor for students, 9 00:00:23,930 --> 00:00:25,260 students like your son Evan, 10 00:00:25,330 --> 00:00:26,990 who happens to come here for therapy. 11 00:00:27,000 --> 00:00:28,430 What does he have to do with this? 12 00:00:28,460 --> 00:00:30,560 It is a conflict of interest for me. 13 00:00:30,730 --> 00:00:32,200 I'm pretty sure the way it works is, 14 00:00:32,270 --> 00:00:34,970 I tell you my problems, not the other way around. 15 00:00:35,020 --> 00:00:36,300 Okay. Uh... 16 00:00:36,340 --> 00:00:38,050 you're putting a lot of pressure on yourself. 17 00:00:38,070 --> 00:00:39,100 Your next move will come. 18 00:00:39,110 --> 00:00:41,820 Maybe take a break and focus on your family for a while? 19 00:00:41,980 --> 00:00:44,140 You're right. 20 00:00:44,210 --> 00:00:46,040 Addressing their potential failures 21 00:00:46,050 --> 00:00:47,900 will help me forget mine 22 00:00:47,920 --> 00:00:49,820 and lead to my next great success. 23 00:00:49,890 --> 00:00:52,200 - That is not at all what I s... - Thank you, Mr. Tim. 24 00:00:52,290 --> 00:00:53,889 You surprised me today. 25 00:00:53,890 --> 00:00:55,420 [CHUCKLES] 26 00:00:55,520 --> 00:00:57,000 [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES] 27 00:00:57,020 --> 00:00:59,760 Heaven help whoever she latches onto first. 28 00:00:59,830 --> 00:01:02,600 Do I still have time to talk about my dog? 29 00:01:04,170 --> 00:01:06,476 - Synced and corrected by 38 00:01:21,900 --> 00:01:23,880 - [DOOR OPENS] - "Montel" and Mentos... 39 00:01:23,890 --> 00:01:25,200 - [DOOR CLOSES] - Fresh talk, fresh breath. 40 00:01:25,220 --> 00:01:26,570 And a friend who's a good friend might say, "Well... " 41 00:01:26,580 --> 00:01:28,000 Hi, Louis. I feel like 42 00:01:28,020 --> 00:01:29,620 you're falling behind on some things. 43 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,320 Uh-oh, like what? 44 00:01:31,430 --> 00:01:33,090 The lawn, for starters. 45 00:01:33,200 --> 00:01:35,060 I literally mowed it yesterday. 46 00:01:35,100 --> 00:01:36,720 And fertilized. It's thriving. 47 00:01:36,900 --> 00:01:38,830 Well, Cattleman's is a mess. 48 00:01:38,930 --> 00:01:40,279 How do you figure that? We just posted 49 00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,770 another month of profits. 50 00:01:41,870 --> 00:01:44,540 We might even be able to stop charging for bread. 51 00:01:44,640 --> 00:01:46,150 - [REMOTE CLICKS] - ... advice to borrowers... 52 00:01:46,170 --> 00:01:47,820 [SIGHS] Well, you've let yourself go! 53 00:01:48,080 --> 00:01:49,810 Alright, no idea what that means. 54 00:01:49,910 --> 00:01:52,550 It means this belly-shelf of yours troubles me. 55 00:01:53,240 --> 00:01:55,880 56 00:01:55,980 --> 00:01:58,150 [BREATHES DEEPLY] 57 00:01:58,250 --> 00:02:00,750 This has been nice. 58 00:02:00,860 --> 00:02:02,690 [BIRDS CHIRPING] 59 00:02:02,790 --> 00:02:04,270 Thanks for letting me stop by, Honey. 60 00:02:04,290 --> 00:02:06,060 Little intense at my place. 61 00:02:06,070 --> 00:02:07,440 [MARIA COOS] 62 00:02:07,460 --> 00:02:09,300 Hi, Maria. 63 00:02:09,360 --> 00:02:11,240 Can you wave to godfather Louis? 64 00:02:11,340 --> 00:02:12,470 Eh? 65 00:02:12,570 --> 00:02:13,860 No? Okay. 66 00:02:13,920 --> 00:02:15,520 What an angel. [CHUCKLES] 67 00:02:15,620 --> 00:02:17,300 - Marvin at work? - Yep. 68 00:02:17,340 --> 00:02:20,140 "Molar Mondays," as he's been calling them... 69 00:02:20,160 --> 00:02:21,740 often. 70 00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:22,940 Can I get you anything? 71 00:02:23,050 --> 00:02:24,510 A snack? Drink? 72 00:02:24,520 --> 00:02:26,600 I wish I could, but it's been brought to my attention 73 00:02:26,610 --> 00:02:28,550 by the love of my life that I've chunked out. 74 00:02:28,650 --> 00:02:30,320 I totally get it. 75 00:02:30,480 --> 00:02:32,570 I haven't been able to lose the last of my baby weight, 76 00:02:32,580 --> 00:02:34,360 no matter how hard I try. 77 00:02:34,620 --> 00:02:36,490 How did Jessica deal with all this? 78 00:02:36,590 --> 00:02:38,530 Well, she defied every law of human physics 79 00:02:38,580 --> 00:02:41,160 and snapped back to Peak Jessica almost instantly. 80 00:02:41,550 --> 00:02:43,600 - She truly is a unicorn. - Hm. 81 00:02:43,640 --> 00:02:46,040 A unicorn with a sharp horn and lots of thoughts. 82 00:02:46,100 --> 00:02:47,919 My three-month checkup is this week, 83 00:02:47,920 --> 00:02:50,650 and I am dreading stepping on that scale. 84 00:02:50,760 --> 00:02:52,720 Those results go on my permanent record. 85 00:02:52,960 --> 00:02:54,019 What we both need 86 00:02:54,020 --> 00:02:56,116 is someone who could help get us on a fitness routine. 87 00:02:56,140 --> 00:02:58,090 Hey, we should be workout buddies. 88 00:02:58,160 --> 00:02:59,720 There's this new Step Aerobics class... 89 00:02:59,760 --> 00:03:02,270 I love it. I'm in. I heard it's an amazing workout, 90 00:03:02,370 --> 00:03:04,489 especially for people like us who live in ranch houses 91 00:03:04,490 --> 00:03:07,260 and don't often experience the fat-burning power of stairs. 92 00:03:09,040 --> 00:03:11,280 Mrs. Norwall's gotta be the worst English teacher ever. 93 00:03:11,310 --> 00:03:13,700 This reading syllabus of hers... awful. 94 00:03:13,760 --> 00:03:16,810 I can't handle any more of these "Canterbury Tales," man. 95 00:03:16,920 --> 00:03:19,540 All my dreams take place on horseback now. 96 00:03:19,600 --> 00:03:21,100 Sometimes I'm the horse. 97 00:03:21,180 --> 00:03:23,850 24 stories, 17,000 lines, 98 00:03:23,920 --> 00:03:26,180 all in Middle English. It's too much. 99 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:29,179 Oh. What's Principal Mathis doing here? 100 00:03:29,180 --> 00:03:30,390 Hello, students. 101 00:03:30,400 --> 00:03:32,019 Mrs. Norwall won't be coming in today. 102 00:03:32,020 --> 00:03:33,646 In fact, she will be out for quite a while. 103 00:03:33,670 --> 00:03:35,870 Did she bore herself to death with her own reading list? 104 00:03:35,960 --> 00:03:37,730 [LAUGHTER] 105 00:03:37,740 --> 00:03:40,300 - She shattered her collarbone. - Oh. 106 00:03:40,370 --> 00:03:41,969 Apparently, her flag football league 107 00:03:41,970 --> 00:03:43,370 plays for keeps near the goal line. 108 00:03:43,440 --> 00:03:45,049 [SIGHS] Anyway, I wanted to introduce 109 00:03:45,050 --> 00:03:47,280 your new substitute teacher, Mr. Grant. 110 00:03:47,550 --> 00:03:49,440 This is awesome! Subs are the best. 111 00:03:49,460 --> 00:03:51,310 - All they do is show movies. - Perfect timing 112 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,740 'cause my mom just got us banned from Blockbuster again. 113 00:03:53,890 --> 00:03:55,260 [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] 114 00:03:55,300 --> 00:03:57,199 - Everybody, listen up! - [CONVERSATIONS STOP] 115 00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:59,360 Let's get something out of the way right now. 116 00:03:59,720 --> 00:04:02,880 There will be no screwing around in here whatsoever... 117 00:04:02,940 --> 00:04:05,380 no movies, no naps, no staring out the window 118 00:04:05,400 --> 00:04:07,580 wishing you were running through a field of barley. 119 00:04:07,600 --> 00:04:08,980 This is a school. 120 00:04:09,060 --> 00:04:11,440 And while I'm your teacher, you are going to learn. 121 00:04:11,500 --> 00:04:13,090 This is all very terrible. 122 00:04:13,120 --> 00:04:14,979 So, everyone, please take out your syllabus. 123 00:04:14,980 --> 00:04:16,266 - [STUDENTS GRUMBLING] - That's right. 124 00:04:16,290 --> 00:04:18,120 And throw it in the trash. 125 00:04:18,160 --> 00:04:20,150 Now get out of your chairs and follow me outside 126 00:04:20,180 --> 00:04:22,700 because today the world is our classroom. 127 00:04:22,740 --> 00:04:23,920 [CLAPS, CHUCKLES] 128 00:04:23,950 --> 00:04:25,510 - Whoo! - [LAUGHS] 129 00:04:25,670 --> 00:04:27,900 [LAUGHTER] 130 00:04:28,020 --> 00:04:30,390 131 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:32,120 You think Mom saw us sneak in here? 132 00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,219 I hope not. Without a job to keep her busy, 133 00:04:34,220 --> 00:04:35,560 - she's on us like a hawk. - Mm. 134 00:04:35,620 --> 00:04:37,840 _ 135 00:04:38,130 --> 00:04:39,140 _ 136 00:04:39,620 --> 00:04:40,980 _ 137 00:04:41,570 --> 00:04:42,960 [DOOR OPENS] 138 00:04:43,180 --> 00:04:44,980 What are you two doing here? 139 00:04:45,150 --> 00:04:46,530 - It looks like loitering... - [SNORING] 140 00:04:46,550 --> 00:04:47,560 ... which is bad. 141 00:04:47,790 --> 00:04:50,260 We were, uh, just about to... 142 00:04:50,320 --> 00:04:51,920 refurbish Grandma's nightstand. 143 00:04:52,910 --> 00:04:54,380 Is your homework done? 144 00:04:54,440 --> 00:04:55,800 Our homework's always done. 145 00:04:56,000 --> 00:04:58,060 [SIGHS] Perfect answer, Evan. 146 00:04:58,160 --> 00:04:59,330 Carry on. 147 00:05:00,630 --> 00:05:02,430 "Refurbish Grandma's nightstand"? 148 00:05:02,500 --> 00:05:04,750 Why would you say that? We're not woodworkers. 149 00:05:04,790 --> 00:05:06,320 I panicked. But don't worry. 150 00:05:06,360 --> 00:05:07,896 It's not like we actually have to do it. 151 00:05:07,920 --> 00:05:09,720 _ 152 00:05:09,920 --> 00:05:11,320 _ 153 00:05:11,430 --> 00:05:12,930 Morning, Grandma. 154 00:05:14,330 --> 00:05:15,930 Let's get this over with. 155 00:05:21,540 --> 00:05:23,240 Ah! I got a splinter. 156 00:05:23,310 --> 00:05:24,679 Grab some tweezers and pull it out. 157 00:05:24,680 --> 00:05:26,780 No way. I can't operate on myself. 158 00:05:26,820 --> 00:05:28,210 Fine. I'll do it. 159 00:05:28,280 --> 00:05:30,040 Uh, I don't know. 160 00:05:30,160 --> 00:05:32,550 Emery, I'm a future doctor-president, 161 00:05:32,580 --> 00:05:34,750 so I'm gonna pull out that splinter. 162 00:05:35,020 --> 00:05:36,680 And then 30 years from now, 163 00:05:36,750 --> 00:05:38,520 I'll pardon you for ever doubting me. 164 00:05:38,620 --> 00:05:40,990 165 00:05:41,090 --> 00:05:42,580 [INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS] 166 00:05:42,600 --> 00:05:45,180 I mean, I can see why this class is so popular. 167 00:05:45,260 --> 00:05:47,330 Everybody here is shredded. 168 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:48,899 One might say this is our first 169 00:05:48,900 --> 00:05:51,040 big step in the right direction. 170 00:05:51,050 --> 00:05:52,600 - [INTENSE MUSIC PLAYS] - DAX: Are you ready to push your bodies 171 00:05:52,620 --> 00:05:55,100 - to the max?! - [CHEERS AND APPLAUSE] 172 00:05:55,200 --> 00:05:56,870 Let's step! 173 00:05:56,970 --> 00:05:58,910 174 00:05:59,000 --> 00:06:00,070 March it out! 175 00:06:00,180 --> 00:06:03,810 176 00:06:03,910 --> 00:06:06,080 Right foot! Touch! 177 00:06:06,120 --> 00:06:07,450 Step! Touch! 178 00:06:07,550 --> 00:06:11,560 Heel... digs... right... here. 179 00:06:12,020 --> 00:06:14,090 Corner knee, single lunge! 180 00:06:14,160 --> 00:06:16,560 Let's go now. Boom, boom, straddle. 181 00:06:16,580 --> 00:06:18,220 Knees up! Knees up! 182 00:06:18,230 --> 00:06:22,260 [RHYTHMIC STOMPING] 183 00:06:22,330 --> 00:06:24,040 [BREATHLESS] I'm... fading. 184 00:06:24,060 --> 00:06:25,300 What is this place?! 185 00:06:26,130 --> 00:06:27,970 I think I'm gonna vomit. We need to go. 186 00:06:28,040 --> 00:06:29,440 [GROANS] 187 00:06:29,470 --> 00:06:31,120 Hey, there's no quitting in Step! 188 00:06:31,140 --> 00:06:33,080 - We're sorry! - Go to hell! 189 00:06:34,710 --> 00:06:38,310 So, Jenny, I was going over the phone bill. 190 00:06:38,380 --> 00:06:40,100 - [SNORES] - [DOOR OPENS, CLOSES] 191 00:06:40,380 --> 00:06:41,950 Whoa. Where are you rushing off to? 192 00:06:41,980 --> 00:06:43,200 To write my English essay. 193 00:06:43,260 --> 00:06:45,880 I've never seen you get home and rush to do schoolwork. 194 00:06:45,990 --> 00:06:47,430 I got a new substitute teacher today, 195 00:06:47,450 --> 00:06:48,660 and I want to impress him. 196 00:06:48,720 --> 00:06:50,320 [BITTERLY] Substitutes. 197 00:06:50,330 --> 00:06:52,690 As if three months off isn't enough vacation already. 198 00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:55,079 He says if it's not clear you care about your subject, 199 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:56,176 we have to write another one. 200 00:06:56,200 --> 00:06:58,730 [NORMAL VOICE] Homework and consequences? 201 00:06:58,740 --> 00:07:01,370 Mr. Grant is the first teacher who actually inspires me. 202 00:07:01,440 --> 00:07:02,670 Wow! 203 00:07:02,870 --> 00:07:04,630 Okay, well, what "Canterbury Tale" 204 00:07:04,640 --> 00:07:06,450 did he assign you? The one with the knight? 205 00:07:06,470 --> 00:07:08,910 The British are always ramrodding knights into everything. 206 00:07:09,010 --> 00:07:10,069 That's the best part! 207 00:07:10,070 --> 00:07:12,080 Mr. Grant lets us choose our own essay topics. 208 00:07:12,150 --> 00:07:14,510 - I'm doing mine on cereal. - Cereal? 209 00:07:14,710 --> 00:07:16,150 What about your syllabus? 210 00:07:16,170 --> 00:07:18,180 Mr. Grant had us throw those away. 211 00:07:18,520 --> 00:07:19,620 [GASPS] 212 00:07:21,150 --> 00:07:23,490 [SNORING] 213 00:07:24,720 --> 00:07:27,030 You can quit pretending to be asleep, Jenny. 214 00:07:27,050 --> 00:07:28,690 Your calls to the Nintendo Hotline 215 00:07:28,700 --> 00:07:30,230 are no longer my concern. 216 00:07:30,520 --> 00:07:33,120 _ 217 00:07:33,360 --> 00:07:35,800 _ 218 00:07:40,820 --> 00:07:42,620 [DOOR OPENS] 219 00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:44,160 [SIGHS] 220 00:07:47,020 --> 00:07:48,680 Excuse me, modern janitor. 221 00:07:48,700 --> 00:07:50,000 Have you seen Mr. Grant? 222 00:07:51,900 --> 00:07:54,080 Hi. I'm Mr. Grant. 223 00:07:54,170 --> 00:07:57,230 [CHUCKLING] Oh. Oh, my mistake. 224 00:07:57,300 --> 00:07:59,980 I-I didn't expect, uh... 225 00:08:00,270 --> 00:08:02,700 Ha ha. I'm Eddie's mother. 226 00:08:02,720 --> 00:08:05,080 - Oh. - I know... "so young." 227 00:08:05,240 --> 00:08:06,600 He's one of your students 228 00:08:06,620 --> 00:08:08,160 who you're allowing to slack off. 229 00:08:08,380 --> 00:08:10,280 I'm sorry, but I-I don't understand. 230 00:08:10,350 --> 00:08:11,960 I know what you're up to. 231 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,650 All you teachers are the same. 232 00:08:13,820 --> 00:08:15,350 You want the least amount of work 233 00:08:15,390 --> 00:08:17,320 for the most amount of pay. 234 00:08:17,460 --> 00:08:19,920 Letting the students decide their essay topics? 235 00:08:19,990 --> 00:08:21,510 You're gonna let them grade them, too? 236 00:08:21,560 --> 00:08:23,170 Oh, no grades on the first draft. 237 00:08:23,190 --> 00:08:24,690 - [DRAMATIC CHORD PLAYS] - No grades? 238 00:08:24,730 --> 00:08:26,830 Not until they get a sense of what I expect. 239 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:30,830 Well, I expect my son's curriculum to be taken seriously. 240 00:08:30,900 --> 00:08:34,000 That syllabus is preparing him for his college-entry exams. 241 00:08:34,070 --> 00:08:36,870 Mrs. Huang, I can assure you Eddie is learning a lot. 242 00:08:37,070 --> 00:08:38,256 You're more than welcome to stay 243 00:08:38,280 --> 00:08:39,660 and absorb what we do in here. 244 00:08:40,480 --> 00:08:42,140 I see your bluff... 245 00:08:42,310 --> 00:08:44,750 - and I call. - [BELL RINGS] 246 00:08:44,850 --> 00:08:48,720 247 00:08:49,250 --> 00:08:51,650 Uh, usually observers sit in the back. 248 00:08:55,060 --> 00:08:56,290 Okay. 249 00:08:58,340 --> 00:09:00,470 Mom? What are you doing here? 250 00:09:00,500 --> 00:09:01,930 I'm "absorbing." 251 00:09:03,230 --> 00:09:04,930 Curveballs are a part of life, Eddie. 252 00:09:05,040 --> 00:09:06,720 The sooner you learn to adjust to them, 253 00:09:06,740 --> 00:09:07,740 the better off you'll be. 254 00:09:07,800 --> 00:09:09,740 Speaking of which... curveball! 255 00:09:10,610 --> 00:09:12,260 Lights out today. 256 00:09:12,740 --> 00:09:14,480 [HIGH-PITCHED VOICE] "But, Mr. Grant, 257 00:09:14,600 --> 00:09:16,790 oh, how are we supposed to read and write in the dark?" 258 00:09:16,910 --> 00:09:19,080 [NORMAL VOICE] By using the original pen and paper... 259 00:09:19,150 --> 00:09:20,820 your imagination. 260 00:09:20,880 --> 00:09:21,880 Nope! 261 00:09:21,950 --> 00:09:25,720 262 00:09:26,020 --> 00:09:27,660 And the curveballs continue. 263 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:29,160 [DOORBELL RINGS] 264 00:09:29,330 --> 00:09:30,360 [GASPS] Louis, 265 00:09:30,560 --> 00:09:32,430 I think I found our next fitness class. 266 00:09:32,530 --> 00:09:33,730 [SIGHS] Good, 267 00:09:33,760 --> 00:09:35,800 because that Step class straight-up ruined me. 268 00:09:35,830 --> 00:09:36,879 - Ugh. - It's been a full day, 269 00:09:36,880 --> 00:09:38,169 and I'm still dehydrated. 270 00:09:38,170 --> 00:09:40,270 - Yeah. - [GULPING LOUDLY] 271 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:42,040 Check this out. 272 00:09:42,100 --> 00:09:44,440 It's a workout designed specifically for new parents. 273 00:09:44,510 --> 00:09:46,740 Honey, this is great. [CHUCKLES] 274 00:09:46,840 --> 00:09:48,310 - Hmm. - _ 275 00:09:48,480 --> 00:09:50,120 Not a lot of men in this photo. 276 00:09:50,150 --> 00:09:53,110 Yes, about that... it's mostly moms. 277 00:09:53,180 --> 00:09:54,780 It's... Mm, it's all moms, 278 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:56,420 but I see no reason you can't come. 279 00:09:56,750 --> 00:10:00,250 I have always seen myself as a bit of a trailblazer. 280 00:10:00,260 --> 00:10:01,890 I don't wear socks to work. 281 00:10:01,960 --> 00:10:03,380 - Oh. - Mm-hmm. 282 00:10:03,480 --> 00:10:04,860 [BOTH CHUCKLE] 283 00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:08,880 [GULPING LOUDLY] 284 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:10,530 So, then he cuts the lights 285 00:10:10,550 --> 00:10:12,970 and starts telling stories in the dark. 286 00:10:13,030 --> 00:10:15,080 What's next? Earplugs in music class? 287 00:10:15,240 --> 00:10:18,120 You started a petition last year to cut our music program. 288 00:10:18,210 --> 00:10:21,140 And now I am asking you to cut Mr. Grant. 289 00:10:21,210 --> 00:10:22,379 Kick that bum to the curb. 290 00:10:22,380 --> 00:10:24,310 Mrs. Huang... [CHUCKLES] 291 00:10:24,380 --> 00:10:26,810 normally when I walk by a sub's classroom, 292 00:10:26,820 --> 00:10:29,880 I hear one of two things... screaming or snoring. 293 00:10:30,050 --> 00:10:32,180 His students are actually paying attention. 294 00:10:32,420 --> 00:10:35,550 He is not going anywhere until Mrs. Norwall returns. 295 00:10:37,830 --> 00:10:39,430 [POUNDING ON DOOR] 296 00:10:41,500 --> 00:10:42,540 Come on, Norwall! 297 00:10:42,550 --> 00:10:45,260 I'm a concerned parent, and you're needed at school! 298 00:10:45,470 --> 00:10:47,700 [DOORKNOB RATTLING] 299 00:10:47,800 --> 00:10:49,540 [GROANS] 300 00:10:51,810 --> 00:10:54,840 You've been knocking for so long. 301 00:10:55,110 --> 00:10:57,850 We need you back at school teaching your syllabus. 302 00:10:57,880 --> 00:10:59,540 Your replacement isn't getting it done. 303 00:10:59,610 --> 00:11:02,050 I have physical therapy twice a day, 304 00:11:02,080 --> 00:11:04,400 and when I cough, I cry from pain. 305 00:11:04,790 --> 00:11:07,620 Well, some people say work is the best medicine. 306 00:11:09,520 --> 00:11:12,240 Fine. I'll need a copy of your syllabus. 307 00:11:12,280 --> 00:11:13,630 Printer's running low. 308 00:11:13,640 --> 00:11:15,500 I'd have to drive to the store for toner. 309 00:11:15,660 --> 00:11:17,280 Thank you. 310 00:11:17,430 --> 00:11:21,530 311 00:11:21,730 --> 00:11:22,900 Extraction time. 312 00:11:23,100 --> 00:11:24,540 I need you to practice. 313 00:11:27,340 --> 00:11:28,810 You can't be serious. 314 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:31,240 Once you break the skin, there's no turning back. 315 00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:33,940 You're a difficult patient. You know that? 316 00:11:35,720 --> 00:11:37,280 [SIGHS] 317 00:11:37,380 --> 00:11:38,750 - [BUZZ] - Come on. 318 00:11:38,760 --> 00:11:40,480 You just basically lacerated my kidney. 319 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,790 - Give me those. - [SIGHS] 320 00:11:43,990 --> 00:11:45,390 There. I got it. 321 00:11:45,490 --> 00:11:46,620 Oh, really? 322 00:11:46,690 --> 00:11:49,330 Did you know this thing is also a lie detector? 323 00:11:49,360 --> 00:11:53,880 [BUZZING] 324 00:11:53,930 --> 00:11:56,370 - How's Evan's old stroller feel, Louis? - [CHUCKLES] 325 00:11:56,470 --> 00:11:57,770 You getting that muscle memory back? 326 00:11:57,780 --> 00:11:58,780 Feels good. 327 00:11:58,790 --> 00:12:00,900 And thanks for agreeing to stop at the grocery store. 328 00:12:01,010 --> 00:12:02,810 This healthy cargo will help trim my waistline 329 00:12:02,840 --> 00:12:04,510 from both the outside and inside. 330 00:12:04,610 --> 00:12:05,610 [CHUCKLES] 331 00:12:05,680 --> 00:12:07,080 Hey, everyone! 332 00:12:07,210 --> 00:12:09,510 Thank you so much for welcoming us to your group. 333 00:12:09,650 --> 00:12:11,650 I'm Honey, and this is my daughter, Maria. 334 00:12:11,950 --> 00:12:13,280 - Aww! - Aww! 335 00:12:13,390 --> 00:12:14,920 I'm Louis, the godfather, 336 00:12:15,020 --> 00:12:16,490 and this is my produce. 337 00:12:16,560 --> 00:12:18,320 [LAUGHTER] 338 00:12:18,390 --> 00:12:21,320 I am so excited to be here and make this hour count. 339 00:12:21,380 --> 00:12:23,530 God knows if I don't get Maria back home 340 00:12:23,540 --> 00:12:24,540 in time for her nap... 341 00:12:24,550 --> 00:12:26,130 - Oh. Yeah. - Mm-hmm. 342 00:12:26,160 --> 00:12:27,930 Are we gonna get started soon? 343 00:12:28,030 --> 00:12:29,770 I really want to get a sweat going today. 344 00:12:29,830 --> 00:12:31,000 Of course! 345 00:12:31,050 --> 00:12:33,170 We just need to sing "The Hello Song" first. 346 00:12:33,270 --> 00:12:34,639 It's a little tune to make sure 347 00:12:34,640 --> 00:12:37,010 that everyone feels welcome and safe. 348 00:12:37,110 --> 00:12:39,640 Ladies, time to sing "Hello"! 349 00:12:39,910 --> 00:12:41,940 TOGETHER: Hello, Honey 350 00:12:42,050 --> 00:12:43,880 Hello, Honey 351 00:12:43,980 --> 00:12:45,350 Hello, Honey 352 00:12:45,420 --> 00:12:47,370 It's nice to see you today 353 00:12:47,380 --> 00:12:48,380 Oh, well... 354 00:12:48,400 --> 00:12:50,220 Hello, Maria 355 00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:51,950 Hello, Maria 356 00:12:52,020 --> 00:12:53,720 Hello, Maria 357 00:12:53,820 --> 00:12:55,860 It's nice to see you... Hello, Bernadette 358 00:12:55,960 --> 00:12:57,630 - _ - Hello, Bernadette 359 00:12:57,730 --> 00:12:59,560 It's nice to see you today 360 00:12:59,580 --> 00:13:01,199 Great! We have sung hello 361 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:02,750 to all the moms and their babies. 362 00:13:02,760 --> 00:13:03,940 I'm... pretty sure 363 00:13:03,950 --> 00:13:06,090 we sung hello to Debra twice, but who's counting? 364 00:13:06,100 --> 00:13:08,300 So, let's, uh... let's get our exercise on! 365 00:13:08,370 --> 00:13:09,740 Ooh, not so fast, Honey. 366 00:13:09,810 --> 00:13:11,410 There's one guest left to go. 367 00:13:11,480 --> 00:13:13,761 [CHUCKLES] I knew if I just stayed patient, you'd sing me. 368 00:13:14,040 --> 00:13:15,780 TOGETHER: Hello, Louis 369 00:13:15,850 --> 00:13:17,410 Hello, Louis 370 00:13:17,420 --> 00:13:19,690 - S-S-Stop singing! Stop singing hello! - [SINGING STOPS] 371 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:22,980 Class is half over. We haven't taken a single strut. 372 00:13:22,990 --> 00:13:24,390 This class stinks. 373 00:13:27,690 --> 00:13:30,030 It's nice to see me today 374 00:13:31,600 --> 00:13:34,960 375 00:13:35,070 --> 00:13:37,399 How do you have Mrs. Norwall's syllabus? 376 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:39,840 A magician never reveals her secrets. 377 00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,470 I drove to her house. 378 00:13:41,570 --> 00:13:43,770 I'm not reading any more "Canterbury Tales," Mom. 379 00:13:43,870 --> 00:13:45,560 I don't care about these boring stories. 380 00:13:45,620 --> 00:13:47,060 You don't have to care. 381 00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:50,210 You just need to learn them for your college-entry exams. 382 00:13:50,310 --> 00:13:51,849 Mr. Grant says the idea that 383 00:13:51,850 --> 00:13:54,250 everyone must go to college to lead a successful life 384 00:13:54,350 --> 00:13:55,540 is a total myth. 385 00:13:55,660 --> 00:13:56,720 Excuse me? 386 00:13:56,800 --> 00:13:59,080 I'm just saying, maybe I don't go to college. 387 00:13:59,140 --> 00:14:01,100 [DRAMATIC CHORD PLAYS] 388 00:14:03,020 --> 00:14:04,640 Eddie, you are going to college! 389 00:14:04,680 --> 00:14:05,940 Or maybe I'm not. 390 00:14:06,020 --> 00:14:07,220 We don't have to decide today. 391 00:14:07,390 --> 00:14:08,890 [SIGHS] 392 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:11,270 I knew it. You're sick. 393 00:14:11,360 --> 00:14:13,290 I'm not sick. I feel awesome. 394 00:14:13,340 --> 00:14:14,600 Oh, you're sick all right. 395 00:14:14,660 --> 00:14:17,290 Sick with a case of "Mr. Grant Fever". 396 00:14:17,410 --> 00:14:19,280 Symptoms include defying your mother 397 00:14:19,350 --> 00:14:21,400 and talking about not going to college. 398 00:14:21,520 --> 00:14:23,520 - You're staying home. - What? 399 00:14:23,630 --> 00:14:25,330 You can't keep me from going to school. 400 00:14:25,340 --> 00:14:26,640 If Mr. Grant won't follow 401 00:14:26,660 --> 00:14:28,660 the standard lesson plan, then I will. 402 00:14:28,820 --> 00:14:30,419 You're gonna be my English teacher? 403 00:14:30,420 --> 00:14:31,459 That's correct. 404 00:14:31,460 --> 00:14:33,830 We'll take it one "Canterbury Tale" at a time. 405 00:14:35,280 --> 00:14:39,450 Looks like today you're reading "The Friar's Tale." 406 00:14:39,650 --> 00:14:40,880 For your essay, 407 00:14:40,980 --> 00:14:42,740 maybe write about woolen cloaks. 408 00:14:42,840 --> 00:14:45,920 All friars wore them, but why? 409 00:14:46,070 --> 00:14:48,240 Fine, but I'm doing this in my room. 410 00:14:48,340 --> 00:14:49,340 [DISH CLATTERS] 411 00:14:49,410 --> 00:14:52,910 412 00:14:53,030 --> 00:14:54,530 You know what? This is fine. 413 00:14:54,630 --> 00:14:56,200 I'll just write left-handed today. 414 00:14:56,270 --> 00:14:57,479 - Oh, I see. - [DOOR SLAMS] 415 00:14:57,480 --> 00:14:58,970 You trust an oven mitt more than me. 416 00:14:59,100 --> 00:15:00,580 Well, can't wait for it to help you 417 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:01,940 pick out a tux for your wedding. 418 00:15:02,600 --> 00:15:03,600 _ 419 00:15:03,680 --> 00:15:05,080 Emery. 420 00:15:05,140 --> 00:15:06,840 _ 421 00:15:07,260 --> 00:15:08,820 _ 422 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:12,500 _ 423 00:15:12,540 --> 00:15:16,160 _ 424 00:15:16,190 --> 00:15:18,790 425 00:15:18,990 --> 00:15:20,990 Let's do this. I trust you. 426 00:15:21,060 --> 00:15:23,620 Now we're talking. Scrubbin' in. 427 00:15:23,690 --> 00:15:25,730 428 00:15:25,900 --> 00:15:27,490 Got it. 429 00:15:27,760 --> 00:15:30,330 Thanks, Evan. I barely felt that. 430 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:32,430 Of course you didn't. I'm a pro. 431 00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:36,700 432 00:15:36,770 --> 00:15:38,100 Eddie, open up. 433 00:15:38,270 --> 00:15:40,570 It turns out I assigned you the wrong story. 434 00:15:40,660 --> 00:15:43,740 You should actually be reading "The Franklin's Tale," 435 00:15:43,850 --> 00:15:45,350 not "The Friar's." 436 00:15:45,550 --> 00:15:46,950 "Franklin's." 437 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:50,560 - [KNOCK ON DOOR] - Eddie? 438 00:15:52,100 --> 00:15:53,180 [GASPS] 439 00:15:53,190 --> 00:15:55,860 440 00:15:56,020 --> 00:15:57,459 A reverse-ditch! 441 00:15:57,460 --> 00:15:59,780 442 00:16:00,080 --> 00:16:01,379 [KNOCK ON DOOR] 443 00:16:01,380 --> 00:16:03,460 Hey, Honey, just checking in. 444 00:16:03,570 --> 00:16:04,620 Whoa. 445 00:16:05,130 --> 00:16:06,670 That is a big cup of cola. 446 00:16:06,730 --> 00:16:09,030 Yeah, well, I mean, what's the point? 447 00:16:09,070 --> 00:16:10,970 I'll never get to exercise again. 448 00:16:11,140 --> 00:16:13,640 I'm sorry Stroller Strut didn't work out. 449 00:16:13,740 --> 00:16:16,410 Oh, no, it's not even that. 450 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,180 I just miss all the little things 451 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:20,210 that have always made me feel like myself. 452 00:16:20,310 --> 00:16:21,710 Jogging, reading, 453 00:16:21,820 --> 00:16:24,350 peeing without having a baby staring back at me. 454 00:16:24,450 --> 00:16:26,190 You just want to get back to the old you. 455 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:28,190 - Exactly. - Well, she's dead. 456 00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,560 What I mean is, I've never been a mom, 457 00:16:31,630 --> 00:16:34,860 but I remember how chaotic it was after Eddie was born. 458 00:16:35,500 --> 00:16:37,360 It caused a lot of my old priorities 459 00:16:37,430 --> 00:16:40,230 to fall by the wayside, but it also made room 460 00:16:40,300 --> 00:16:43,080 for all sorts of great, new ones I never expected. 461 00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:46,500 - I am a way safer driver. - [CHUCKLES] 462 00:16:46,570 --> 00:16:48,470 I had to quit my Tuesday night bowling league 463 00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:50,410 because that's when Evan's debate team competes, 464 00:16:50,480 --> 00:16:51,626 and I didn't want to miss that. 465 00:16:51,650 --> 00:16:53,680 That's probably how I got this belly-shelf. 466 00:16:53,980 --> 00:16:55,600 Well, bowling isn't really exercise. 467 00:16:55,620 --> 00:16:57,640 It is the way we bowl. 468 00:16:57,900 --> 00:17:00,150 So, yes, you might miss the "old you," 469 00:17:00,190 --> 00:17:01,490 but I think you'll find 470 00:17:01,500 --> 00:17:03,080 the "new you" is awesome, too. 471 00:17:03,970 --> 00:17:05,240 I guess I've spent so much time 472 00:17:05,310 --> 00:17:07,660 focusing on what in my life is ending, 473 00:17:07,680 --> 00:17:10,220 I really haven't thought about everything that's beginning. 474 00:17:10,240 --> 00:17:11,360 I did the same thing. 475 00:17:11,460 --> 00:17:13,560 But trust me... what's beginning is great. 476 00:17:14,750 --> 00:17:17,180 - Thanks, Louis. - You're welcome. [CHUCKLES] 477 00:17:18,250 --> 00:17:19,650 Also, if I had to do it again, 478 00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:20,936 I wouldn't have said you were dead. 479 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:23,020 I came in a little hot. It was for effect. 480 00:17:23,130 --> 00:17:29,640 481 00:17:30,370 --> 00:17:32,380 Um... yes? 482 00:17:32,920 --> 00:17:36,150 Why are you trying to destroy my son's future? 483 00:17:36,290 --> 00:17:38,320 Mrs. Huang, I'm not sure why you would say that. 484 00:17:38,400 --> 00:17:40,200 - Eddie's doing great. - Yes. 485 00:17:40,230 --> 00:17:43,220 He's doing great at not following his old lesson plan, 486 00:17:43,250 --> 00:17:44,540 so when he arrives today, 487 00:17:44,610 --> 00:17:46,540 I'm taking him home to teach it myself. 488 00:17:46,980 --> 00:17:48,679 You know, I understand 489 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:51,890 why you want him to read those stories and write those essays. 490 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,750 It's a necessary skill. 491 00:17:53,890 --> 00:17:55,720 I actually was just reading a student paper 492 00:17:55,740 --> 00:17:57,940 on British culture earlier. 493 00:17:58,210 --> 00:18:01,210 "It is that generational focus on casual pleasantries 494 00:18:01,280 --> 00:18:02,980 that has influenced the way people interact 495 00:18:03,010 --> 00:18:04,920 across a myriad of situations, 496 00:18:04,980 --> 00:18:07,270 no matter what they may confront in the day ahead." 497 00:18:07,440 --> 00:18:09,700 See, now, that sounds pretty good. 498 00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:12,520 As a former author, I would know. 499 00:18:12,640 --> 00:18:13,910 Well, I'm glad you think so 500 00:18:14,080 --> 00:18:16,010 because Eddie wrote this. 501 00:18:16,080 --> 00:18:17,680 No. Eddie wrote his paper on cereal. 502 00:18:17,780 --> 00:18:18,940 "And that concludes my theory 503 00:18:19,010 --> 00:18:20,800 of how the British phrase 'Cheerio' 504 00:18:20,830 --> 00:18:23,870 inspired the name of one of my favorite cereals." 505 00:18:24,070 --> 00:18:25,750 He did such a great job 506 00:18:25,760 --> 00:18:28,300 because he wrote about something he felt excited about. 507 00:18:28,340 --> 00:18:30,450 And that's gonna give him confidence come test time, 508 00:18:30,470 --> 00:18:31,600 no matter the subject. 509 00:18:31,720 --> 00:18:34,709 Okay, but that doesn't explain class in the dark 510 00:18:34,710 --> 00:18:37,480 or saying that college might not be for everyone. 511 00:18:37,570 --> 00:18:40,200 My goal is for students to discover their true passion 512 00:18:40,330 --> 00:18:43,050 so they don't find themselves staring at the ceiling one day, 513 00:18:43,080 --> 00:18:45,000 wondering what they're gonna do with their lives. 514 00:18:46,160 --> 00:18:48,190 You're right. 515 00:18:48,460 --> 00:18:50,460 It is important to find your passion. 516 00:18:52,230 --> 00:18:53,860 You're a good teacher, Mr. Grant. 517 00:18:54,700 --> 00:18:56,930 I am glad Eddie is your student. 518 00:18:57,050 --> 00:18:59,050 Well, I learn as much from them as they do from me. 519 00:18:59,080 --> 00:19:00,950 - Don't ruin this. - Sorry. 520 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:04,890 [SCALE CREAKS] 521 00:19:05,140 --> 00:19:07,550 So, Doc, about these few extra pounds 522 00:19:07,580 --> 00:19:09,440 I can't seem to lose... 523 00:19:09,560 --> 00:19:12,130 This is America. We have a pill for this, right? 524 00:19:12,380 --> 00:19:13,950 Maybe a little Fen-Phen? 525 00:19:14,050 --> 00:19:15,580 You are pregnant. 526 00:19:15,600 --> 00:19:17,440 Right. I was pregnant, 527 00:19:17,490 --> 00:19:19,750 and now I'm asking for a little Fen-Phen. 528 00:19:19,870 --> 00:19:21,740 Is this an insurance issue? 529 00:19:21,780 --> 00:19:23,060 'Cause if you don't accept my plan, 530 00:19:23,070 --> 00:19:25,910 I think you'll find out we're also covered by 531 00:19:26,060 --> 00:19:27,430 "Green Shield." 532 00:19:27,500 --> 00:19:30,060 Let's start over. You are pregnant. 533 00:19:30,100 --> 00:19:32,360 Oh, my God. I'm pregnant. 534 00:19:33,100 --> 00:19:35,669 I guess I'm gonna be the new me for a little bit longer, 535 00:19:35,670 --> 00:19:37,980 and then I'm gonna be a newer new me. 536 00:19:38,470 --> 00:19:41,179 Marvin, we're having another baby! 537 00:19:41,180 --> 00:19:43,110 [LAUGHING] Hot dog! 538 00:19:43,210 --> 00:19:44,750 Irish twins! 539 00:19:44,860 --> 00:19:46,530 As a child of Irish immigrants, 540 00:19:46,550 --> 00:19:48,080 I'm not the biggest fan of that term. 541 00:19:48,130 --> 00:19:49,830 Well, you should be 542 00:19:50,140 --> 00:19:52,600 'cause it means your countrymen are always having sex. 543 00:19:52,710 --> 00:19:54,720 - [SQUEALS] - [LAUGHS] 544 00:19:57,710 --> 00:20:00,120 Crap. I ran too slow. 545 00:20:00,200 --> 00:20:02,010 [SIGHS] You can't stop me. 546 00:20:02,110 --> 00:20:03,979 I want to read my essay to the class today. 547 00:20:03,980 --> 00:20:05,449 _ 548 00:20:05,450 --> 00:20:06,940 You won't be needing that, Eddie. 549 00:20:07,190 --> 00:20:08,920 I spoke with Mr. Grant. 550 00:20:08,990 --> 00:20:11,890 I realized I'm quite lucky he's your teacher. 551 00:20:11,970 --> 00:20:14,440 I feel like this is a trick... or a trap... 552 00:20:14,500 --> 00:20:15,920 or a trick that leads me into a trap. 553 00:20:15,940 --> 00:20:16,940 It's neither. 554 00:20:16,980 --> 00:20:18,000 Really? 555 00:20:18,330 --> 00:20:19,700 Whatever you choose to study, 556 00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:22,000 I want you to be passionate about it. 557 00:20:22,100 --> 00:20:23,720 No matter the subject. 558 00:20:24,440 --> 00:20:26,040 And just so we're clear, 559 00:20:26,080 --> 00:20:27,680 you will be going to college, a good one. 560 00:20:27,780 --> 00:20:30,180 Right, Mom. I know. Totally. 561 00:20:30,240 --> 00:20:32,210 Maybe I'll major in nutritional engineering. 562 00:20:32,360 --> 00:20:34,490 - Oh, engineering! - Yeah! 563 00:20:34,600 --> 00:20:37,000 I'm thinking I could be a cereal inventor. 564 00:20:37,100 --> 00:20:38,919 And we'll keep thinking because 565 00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:40,280 we don't have to decide today. 566 00:20:41,370 --> 00:20:42,700 Okay. Go. 567 00:20:42,800 --> 00:20:45,480 568 00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,819 So, I told Principal Mathis that Mrs. Norwall 569 00:20:49,820 --> 00:20:52,640 should keep her fragile bones at home all year. 570 00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:54,350 Her students are in great hands. 571 00:20:54,450 --> 00:20:55,949 You know, it sounds like your passion 572 00:20:55,950 --> 00:20:57,450 is your child's education. 573 00:20:57,520 --> 00:21:00,590 In fact, maybe teaching is something for you to explore. 574 00:21:00,690 --> 00:21:02,420 Teacher? No. 575 00:21:02,670 --> 00:21:04,570 I was already one of those. 576 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,240 - Long story. - We can skip it. 577 00:21:06,270 --> 00:21:08,580 Great, because what I want to focus on 578 00:21:08,730 --> 00:21:11,100 is making sure all my kids' teachers 579 00:21:11,120 --> 00:21:13,320 are up to snuff, like Mr. Grant, 580 00:21:13,340 --> 00:21:16,840 which is why I have decided to enter the world 581 00:21:16,960 --> 00:21:19,070 of school administration. 582 00:21:19,170 --> 00:21:20,240 Oh. 583 00:21:20,390 --> 00:21:22,720 - You mean like a principal? - Exactly. 584 00:21:22,830 --> 00:21:24,390 [BREATHES DEEPLY] 585 00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:26,519 Teacher-boss. 586 00:21:26,520 --> 00:21:30,920 - Synced and corrected by MementMori - -- www.addic7ed.com -- 587 00:21:30,970 --> 00:21:35,520 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0